THIS PLACE IS A MESS
(Cleaning 101)
If you have issues, and really can’t live in a place that’s anything less than sparkling clean, I have two bits of advice.
First, get over it! Dirt happens, and if you can’t deal with that, you’d better live alone, because you will drive your roommates nuts!
Second, if you can’t get over it, you will need greater resources than I will offer here. We’re just going to touch on the basics, enough to keep your habitat from looking like it needs federal disaster assistance.
If you simply must know more, I advise you to head for the library and look for books on cleaning–yes they have them! While you are reading those books, the rest of us will be done with our chores, out the door and getting on with our lives.
Cleaning Supplies
Many of the basic tools for cleaning can be found at garage sales, but it’s not likely you’ll find them all. After you’ve checked to see if your mom has extra sponges or one too many mops, hit the discount stores like Target, Wal-mart and K-mart. Check grocery stores last, as their prices are probably higher.
You will find there are many varieties to choose from. Do you want a sponge mop, or the old fashioned string mop? Would you prefer an angled broom, or natural bristles? Pick the ones that appeal to you, because if you don’t like them you won’t use them, and if you don’t use them, nothing will get clean!
Also, you don’t necessarily need all of these. Some things can serve double duty; a sponge can clean a toilet bowl as well as a toilet brush…but don’t use the same sponge to wash the dishes too!
The Equipment: broom, dust pan, mop, bucket, sponge, dish drainer, toilet brush, dish gloves (not just for dishes, they make cleaning that toilet less revolting–but get a separate pair just for the toilet!), dish towels, old towels, old toothbrush, vacuum, floor sweeper.
The Cleaning Products: dish soap, automatic dishwashing soap (if you’re lucky enough to have a dishwasher), an all purpose cleaner (i.e. 409), cleanser (i.e. Comet), toilet bowl cleaner, cleanser with bleach, window cleaner. And club soda–yes, it does work on some things!
WHERE DO I START?!?
So, the house is a wreck and your folks are coming to get a look at the place they co-signed for. What do you do first?
1) De-Clutter
Everyone has their own style of picking up the clutter. You can clean one entire room at a time. Or you can clean different categories of the mess. First pick up all dirty dishes and wash them (or load the dishwasher). Second, pick up all dirty clothes, and put them in a hamper for laundry day. Third, pick up papers, books, and miscellaneous.
If neither of these works too well, I advise the just keep moving strategy. This is exactly what it sounds like. Pick something up and go put it away, pick something up there, and go put it away, pick something up there…. You get the idea. This will take the longest, but eventually you may feel compelled to clean an entire room, or category, thereby falling, accidentally, into another, more efficient strategy. Meanwhile, at least you’re making progress!
2) Dust and Wipe
Once the clutter is out of the way, use a feather duster or soft towel to dust book shelves, computers, TV screens–whatever needs it. Don’t forget dust bunnies in the corners of ceilings and under furniture! Then grab a sponge and spray cleaner and wash the tops of coffee tables, desks, countertops–don’t forget kitchen counters and sinks! Finally, paper towels and window cleaner to clean mirrors, sliding glass doors (especially if you have dogs that leave nose prints!) and…windows! You are almost there, only one more basic step left!
3) Mop and Vacuum
Now you have worked from the top down, so it’s time to clean up what’s left–the floors. Mop and vacuum!
GETTING TO THE BOTTOM OF THINGS (sinks, tubs and…toilets!)
Some cleaning projects require more elbow grease (scrubbing) and serious cleaning products (bleach and disinfectants). Sinks, tubs and showers, and toilets definitely fit in this category. O.M.O. SURVIVAL TIP: the longer you wait between cleanings, the worse the crud you have to clean! This was never more true than it is for is for sinks, tubs and showers, and toilets.
Unless only one person uses certain bathrooms, this is definitely a job to be rotated between roommates. You might want to have a day just for bathrooms, that way the whole cleaning thing isn’t such a HUGE deal, and you’ll finish sooner, and that’s a good goal!
1) All Germs Are Not Equal
Different areas of you home have different kinds of germs, therefore, you will want to use one sponge for the toilets, one for the bathroom sinks, counters, tub and shower, and a third sponge for kitchen sinks and counters.
2) Make Friends with the Enemies of Germs
Look for products that say germ killer, disinfectant, anti-bacterial, and bleach; these are the things that kill the germs and along with the germs go the smells, the mold, and–unseen, but still there–the possibility of illness. So clean frequently!
Germs that are most likely to be health problems are going to show up in the kitchen, where you’ve been setting uncooked chicken, or meats, but haven’t cleaned up well afterward. Remember all those things your mom told you about food poisoning? Well, it’s true. So be certain that any surface on which you’ve prepared raw chicken or meat is cleaned with a product that specifically says it cleans bacteria. O.M.O. SURVIVAL TIP: look for the words “anti-bacterial” for the best guarantee that you are killing germs.
This advice applies to the plates, cutting boards and utensils you use as well. For instance, don’t carry raw chicken out to the grill on a plate, and then bring the cooked chicken back in on the same plate. Use a clean plate for the cooked food, and wash the first plate/utensils/whatever before using again.
Save a little on the elbow grease by buying products that have some built in scrubbers, like a powdered cleanser. These work great, and if they also contain bleach (look for the word bleach on the package) that’s even better.
If bacon is a food group at your house, or any other food that has a lot of grease, look for the words cuts grease, or something similar, on the package.
Finally, you can also use those powdered cleansers for sinks and tubs that have serious rings around them. These cleansers work pretty well on most jobs, just be sure to rinse well afterward, so that you’re not standing on gritty residue when you take a shower.
There are many specialized products for soap scum, mildew, and miscellaneous, difficult to ID filth. Some claim to do the work for you, eating away at dirt and muck, saving you hard physical labor. Some work better than others. If you have the cash to spare, try a few. Most of these, however, work best if used often. If you are the once a month type, don’t toss the cleanser just yet.
3) It’s a Dirty job, but….
There’s no question that cleaning the toilet is everyone’s least favorite job. O.M.O. SURVIVAL TIP: take turns doing “bowl patrol”, and don’t procrastinate when it’s your turn. It’s only fair!
Before you start, go around to all the toilets and squirt toilet bowl cleaner generously around all the inner rims. Then go have a snack, watch Simpson reruns, or, what the heck read a book!
After a half-hour or so, grab your cleaning supplies and start with the sinks, counters, tub and shower. Save those toilets for last. By the time you get to them, odds are the toilet bowl cleaner has done a great job and you will only have to scrub lightly with the toilet brush, flush and wash down the outer edges of the toilet bowl, tank and surrounding floor. O.M.O. LIFE TIP: for those of you who have to aim to pee, the first time you clean the floor around the toilet you will finally appreciate everything your mother said about aiming straight. So do, and there will be less to clean!
If you have procrastinated to the point that things are looking crusty in there, you will still need to squirt that toilet bowl cleaner, but be prepared to scrub harder with the toilet bowl brush. You might even need to sprinkle cleanser around and use the sponge. If it comes to this, I recommend a pair of rubber gloves–like the kitchen dish gloves–that are used exclusively for cleaning the toilet bowl. DON’T use them to wash dishes!! Didn’t you read the stuff about germs?!?
TIPS
Stains on Carpet and Furniture
What about spills on the carpet and furniture? In many cases, spraying or pouring a little water on the stain and blotting with a clean cloth or paper towels will remove most of the stain. You may have to repeat this.
Many people swear that doing the same with club soda is the very best way to clean up spots. If you have some, try it. Everybody has their own ideas about what works best on stains. These ideas come from their own experience, their parent’s advice, or something they heard.
Cleaning stains is one of those things that you refine over time and your own experience. Start with water or club soda. If these don’t work, try a product made specifically for carpets and/or upholstery. There are a lot of those too, so ask others what’s worked for them.
Red stains, from things like cough syrup or juice, can be some of the toughest. If you have one that you just can’t get out, and your damage deposit is at risk, call professional carpet cleaners, they have their ways, and they will often only charge you per spot. It’s not cheap, but it’s probably less than the damage deposit.
O.M.O. SURVIVAL TIP: get estimates from three carpet cleaning companies before you have the work done, that way you can find the best deal. Don’t be afraid to ask about available discounts and coupons!
O.M.O. LIFE TIP: whenever possible, get three estimates for any work you want done–prices can vary!
If your spot is mud or dirt that’s been tracked in, pick up the biggest pieces by hand, and then let the rest dry completely. After it’s dry, vacuum over the dirt. This should take out most of it.
Dog and Cat Hair
Don’t underestimate what a pain pet hair can be to clean up. You’ll be amazed how quickly it fills a vacuum cleaner bag! You should also have some kind of lint brush or roller for furniture and clothes that are covered with pet hairs. In a pinch, tape works too. Wind it inside out around your hand, and then swipe your hand over the fabric. A blazer or sweater covered with hairs makes a bad impression on dates and job interviews.
Don’t Smoke In the House
Houses that have been smoked in not only smell like it–they look like it too. Smoke leaves a residue that discolors the paint. When it comes time to sell that house your Landlord will have a harder time doing so if it’s labeled a “smoker’s house”. Nonsmokers can often tell before they walk in the door! If you are going to smoke in the house/apartment, be sure it’s okay with the Landlord; get it in writing!
Better yet, learn now, before you OWN a home, to smoke outside and keep your butts in a safe container. Same goes for cars.
O.M.O. LIFE TIP: from the cost of cigarettes, to the cost of health care, from the effect on the value of your property, to the value of the impression you make on others, cigarette smoking is an expensive habit. Consider stopping, there’s lots of help out there, just ask a doctor, or go online! (Yes, that sounded like your mom…get over it!) (see Addendum A: Resources)
P.S….need something to do with your hands while you’re stopping a bad habit such as smoking? Clean house!
Keep up this great resource